Archive for August, 2014

Dive into Anime World

No Comments The Life

Lately, I watched many anime series and movies, with many different genres. Well, it’s not something new for sure, but the number of anime I watched currently increased at somewhat high rate. Perhaps it’s at a rate that may disturb my daily activity if it keeps increasing, but I’m sure I still have control over it. Anyway, let’s talk about it a little.

For some people, anime doesn’t suit their taste, since the drawing is weird, usually with big eyed characters, small and overly cute face, overly slender body or curvy with nice pair of breasts, high tone or annoying way of speaking, and some weird behavior or even weird story. Those were what I thought several years ago before I used to all characters. Some of my friends also has the rejection over anime with the similar reasons, so I think what I wrote almost surely applied to general people who oppose to watch anime regularly.

My anime hobby (or perhaps addiction, though I believe I’m not in a level of addiction) usually triggered when I read some online articles about the anime itself or simply when I know about it from a certain source, which recently is Osu!, a rhythm game which mainly use anime songs for the content, and show many arts and animations in the background as we are playing the song.

I must admit that several animes that I saw were far more than my initial expectations. Umm, usually I had negative expectations from animes, which may simply because the story might be easily guested, or the character is lame and perhaps just too much fan services, i.e. scenes that provide the audiences some “happy” content, like breast jiggling or panty shots. Lately many anime doesn’t use much light story or fan services anymore, instead the writers are creative enough to create story twist which may expand your regular thought. However, they still have light fan services though, but enough for fun and not causing hindrance in characters or stories.

Some of the animes brought the popular culture on their story, such as Sword Art Online (SAO), which the season one just I finished watch recently. The story is about the MMORPG which operated with virtual reality devices, with some story twist, realistic MMO experience (if you are an MMO player, you might have know almost every rule there), and lovely beautiful romance. Initially SAO doesn’t actually attract me to watch even I have heard or read the articles about it, but my curiosity is strong enough to make me watch this anime, and it’s not disappointing for sure. Well, I also should admit it since someone tell me a clue that the story might be interesting several days ago, and at the same time, my housemate have that anime in his possession.

Another anime that have nice story which you may not expected if you have not watch it is Puella Magi Madoka Magica, which tells about several magical girls with the problems that they should solve. The story of this one is so dark that you may think and think and think when you have finished the anime series, and perhaps you may want to watch the movie which is the continuity of anime series. From what I experienced after watched this anime, I will not have the same view again on the magical girls genre. Usually, the magical girls genre is so weird for me since the target should be female audiences or children, but this one is far from that target, although the art and characters are somewhat represent the childish. Anyway, watch it and you may understand what I mean, since I don’t want to spoil anything here. It will destroy your general views on magical girls genre which have been known to be happy ending, like Sailor Moon or Wedding Peach (old school anime series which I watched when I was in elementary school).

Well, there are many more anime that I have watched, but still limited enough so I can list them here, of course the recommended only:

  • Sword Art Online (I have described it above, generally fun and have good and deep romance, based on light novel)
  • Puella Magi Madoka Magika (also described above, really sad and dark, not suitable for children or easily depressed person)
  • Hataraku Maou-sama (about a demon king which transferred to human world and works at a restaurant chain, really funny, based on light novel)
  • No Game No Life (about a world where every conflict should be resolved with games, funny and has heavy plot, based on light novel)
  • A Certain Magical Index / Toaru Majutsu no Index (a story about magic and technology / science, the dark world behind it and struggle of the people who has the power, based on light novel)
  • A Certain Scientific Railgun / Toaru Kagaku no Railgun (a side story of Index above, which mainly focused in the scientific side, have funny plot and some sweet romance, based on the same light novel)
  • Tokyo Ghoul (about a humanoid species which resemble vampires that roams the city of Tokyo, dark and bloody, though many parts are censored since they’re far too gory)
  • Full Metal Alchemist (if you follow the manga, this simply a spin off and doesn’t follow the manga story)
  • Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood (this one is following the manga story, so if you want to see the anime version of the manga, this one is for you)
  • Kill la Kill (about the struggle of a girl who want to avenge the father dead, the story and arts are weird, uncommon and unrealistic, but still fun enough to be followed)

If you read the summary above, many of them are based on light novel. A light novel itself is Japanese style novel which published regularly. I have researched about it a little and found that many of the novels have been adapted to animes. That’s why I would really like to read the novel itself since many of the animes now only covered early chapters, mainly less than 10 chapters when the novels have published in about 10 or 20 chapters.

That’s what I can tell about anime. If you have recommendation about what animes I should watch, please inform me. I love animes that have nice and uncommon story like what I listed above. And if you a newbie in anime, or just want to try to change your view in anime, you might want to try the animes above. ;)


This entry was last modified on: September 7th, 2017 at 1:29

Nightmare Diary #1

Lately I have several weird dreams, well, some people might called it as nightmares. I don’t really understand the pattern of this kind of dreams, but I’m sure it appears about every 3 or 4 days. Usually it is about failed relationship, or simply a massive accident or disaster that happens to a group of people.¬† I’m not sure if the nightmares were triggered by a certain event or what, since the pattern is kind of regular, which of course I can use to manage.

The latest nightmare (tonight) is about a group of high school children who have tour with a big bus on the beach. I don’t understand why but the bus itself driven into the shore area which have some extensively tilted position. For that kind of bus, the body cannot stay still when it was in that kind of position, however the driver kept driving at the same dangerous approaches again and again. Then the horror event occurred, the bus couldn’t hold itself on tilted sand and finally tumbled into the sand. To make it even worse, the sand was quicksand and the sea water was rising, that meant the bus’ body drowned fast into the ground.

I myself who didn’t go with that bus, but a bystander that witnessed that event, ran into that bus and tried to dig the sand with my bare hand. I didn’t see any other people around there initially, but several minutes into digging (well, not sure¬† if it’s minutes or just seconds), which the sand ridiculously transformed into paving blocks, I found several nostalgic items from the past. Many of them are things from my high school memories, such as the leaflets from high school events, namecards of some different people, high school bags, etc. The people gathered around that place, which consists of some my high school friends which I recognized, looked into the found items, laughed and had chat. I kept digging the paving blocks, several layers of them, thrown away them one by one but the bus still didn’t appear until I fell into despair and stopped.

That was when I woke up, opened my eyes and couldn’t sleep anymore and decided to write this post instead. Well, though I also set an alarm to wake me up early this morning to do some of my works an hour later, that was why I didn’t want to go sleep again.

The nightmare for this night in fact really intense since it’s about tragedy with many people. Several latest nightmares I had were mainly about relationships which also ended up as bad ending or weird tragedy, but nothing were as intense as this latest one. In fact, usually I didn’t really concerned with the previous dreams, and fell asleep immediately after I woken up, but this one is kinda different since it’s about disaster with many “people” within it. Sigh… I hope one day I will be able to induce lucid dreams instead of this weird dreams. I feel my energy drained because of this nightmare, hopefully I can still do my work properly this day.

Regarding the number on the title, perhaps I will write more about the nightmares (as long as I remember them), just to ensure the pattern, so I can manage it. Ugh, self management, especially for something ridiculous like this is burdening >_< Will be glad if this could end up, or at least doesn’t happen regularly like lately.

This entry was last modified on: September 7th, 2017 at 1:29

Good Luck?

Ketika seseorang mau melakukan sesuatu yang cukup besar, berisiko atau menantang, misalnya wawancara kerja, ujian, atau mengejar jodoh, kadang kala kita mendengar orang lain mengucapkan “Good Luck”, atau kalau dibahasakan ke Bahasa Indonesia menjadi “semoga beruntung”. Yup, semoga beruntung, alias hoki, atau kalau mau menggunakan kebalikannya, maka “semoga tidak sial”. Sejujurnya dulu saya sendiri sudah menyadari maknanya tersebut, tapi ah, biarlah, toh memang kadang saya perlu keberuntungan atas apa yang saya lakukan.

Beberapa bulan belakangan, saya menghadapi cukup banyak masalah yang bisa dibilang tidak mudah saya hadapi, khususnya masalah sosial. Bila Anda sekalian membaca post-post saya sebelumnya, tentunya yang ada dalam Bahasa Inggris, maka Anda akan mengerti bahwa masalah saya berhubungan dengan perasaan. Tapi jangan salah, masalah yang saya maksudkan di sini lebih ke masalah pekerjaan, yang membutuhkan rasionalitas dibanding hanya menerka-nerka atau mencoba-coba seperti masalah jodoh.

Ketika saya dihadapi oleh kesulitan, seringkali saya mendengar teman-teman saya mengatakan “GL alias Good Luck” tersebut, tapi entah kenapa saya merasa ga nyaman dengan sebutan tersebut. Seperti yang saya tuliskan di atas, kecenderungan kata tersebut seperti menganggap bahwa saya hanya akan berhasil bila saya memiliki keberuntungan yang besar. Padahal bila saya cek diri saya, keburuntungan saya hampir ga ada sama sekali. Saya belum pernah menang judi, belum pernah mendapatkan hadiah undian, belum pernah mendapatkan tiba-tiba uang saya di bank bertambah sendiri; bagaimana bisa mereka meminta saya untuk mengandalkan keberuntungan? Tapi tetap, walau demikian, saya mengapresiasi kata-kata teman saya tersebut, yang sebagian besar mungkin tidak tahu mengenai makna di baliknya, dan juga tidak mengetahui bahwa saya tidak terlalu suka mendengar kata tersebut.

Lalu apa yang bisa dikatakan oleh rekan-rekan saya tersebut? Sebenarnya banyak alternatif ucapan lainnya yang tidak terlalu mengandalkan “kekuatan alam dan ilahi” tersebut, misalnya saja, “selamat berjuang” atau “semoga sukses”. Dalam Bahasa Inggris juga bisa disebutkan “do well” (lakukan yang terbaik), “all the best” (sama, lakukan yang terbaik), atau “finger crossed” (silangkan jari). Saya mendapatkan frase tersebut dengan mudah dari pencarian Google dengan menggunakan kata kunci “good luck alternatives”.

Saat pencarian tersebut (sebenarnya sudah cukup lama saya mencari alternatifnya), saya menemukan ternyata tidak sedikit orang yang menghindari menggunakan kata-kata yang bermuatan mistis tersebut, alias keberuntungan. Mungkin karena sudah lekat di telinga orang Indonesia, banyak dari kita yang lebih mengandalkan kata “good luck”, dibanding alternatif-alternatif tersebut, dan akhirnya menjadi terbiasa dengan kata tersebut, baik sebagai pendengar maupun sebagai pengucap. Tidak ada masalah dengan kata tersebut, hanya memang sebagian kecil orang seperti saya sedikit sensitif atas penggunaan kata-kata yang kurang tepat dalam keseharian. Pada akhirnya hal itu kembali kepada masing-masing orang sebagai preferensi :)

Oh iya, bagi saya tentu saja “good luck” bukan sesuatu yang dapat dengan mudah dihilangkan. Kata ini bisa digunakan sebagai sarkasme terhadap orang yang tidak kita suka. Misalnya saja:

A: Hei, saya bisa mengerjakan semua pekerjaan yang harusnya diselesaikan dalam 14 hari dalam semalam saja. Jadi biarin lah saya main sebentar, oke?

B: Oh, gitu ya? Kalau gitu good luck yah!

A: Sip.

Dalam kasus di atas, keberuntungan memang sangat diperlukan, apalagi Anda tahu bahwa si A bukan orang yang mampu mengerjakan dalam 1 hari dan hanya keberuntungan yang bisa menyalamatkan dia. Yah, terkadang saya menggunakan kata tersebut untuk diri saya sendiri yang dalam beberapa kejadian lebih memilih untuk menunda pekerjaan sampai akhirnya harus berjuang keras di hari terakhir. Hhhhh… Kebiasaan yang memang tidak boleh terus menerus dilanjutkan, dan tentu saja hanya memerlukan niat untuk menghilangkannya.

Lalu bagaimana bila Anda tidak suka dengan frase tersebut diucapkan oleh orang lain? Bagaimana caranya mengatakannya kepada teman kita tersebut? Masa kita bilang frontal, “maaf, saya ga perlu keberuntungan karena saya punya skill dan kemampuan untuk menghadapi masalah tersebut”? Kalimat tersebut seolah-olah membuat kita terlihat sombong karena, yup, kadang bagi mereka menggunakan kemampuan sendiri adalah sombong, apalagi di negara agama seperti Indonesia di mana kuasa ilahi masih merupakan sebuah kewajiban yang disertakan dalam setiap kegiatan yang kita lakukan. Tapi memang kadang kita perlu seperti itu bila memang mau dilihat sebagai orang yang rasional.

Cara lainnya yang bisa kita lakukan adalah menghindari kata tersebut dari diri kita sendiri. Bila kita terbiasa menggunakan kalimat lain, beberapa orang yang cukup sensitif akan dapat menangkap maksud dari kita bahwa kita memang menghindari kata tersebut. Tentu saja ini hanya untuk orang-orang yang cukup sensitif untuk dapat mencerna maksud Anda tersebut. Bila bertemu orang yang kurang sensitif, katakan saja dengan sedikit bercanda, “jangan good luck lah, kalau ga hoki gimana coba, ‘sukses selalu’ aja mendingan”, atau kalau perlu dengan kalimat pertama yang saya katakan tadi. Toh bila orangnya kurang sensitif, dia juga bukan tipe orang yang mudah tersinggung atau berpikiran macam-macam kepada Anda.

Jadi secara tak langsung, mari kita budayakan saja menghindari ucapan “good luck” tersebut, dan ganti menjadi “semoga sukses” atau “all the best” bila Anda ingin sedikit terlihat keren karena Bahasa Inggris. :)

Entry ini ditulis oleh seseorang yang cukup sensitif terhadap kata-kata yang diucapkan orang. Bersikaplah lebih sensitif (empati) kepada orang sensitif, karena sewaktu-waktu Anda akan mendapatkan balasan yang setimpal atas empati Anda tersebut.

PS: Sekali-kali pakai Bahasa Indonesia aja untuk posting blog ini, berhubung sebentar lagi 17 Agustus, jadi harus lebih nasionalis dengan penggunaan Bahasa Indonesia yang baik dan benar, dan sedikit gaul. Hehehe… Ga juga, ke depannya akan ada beberapa post yang menggunakan bahasa ibu pertiwi koq. Kadang penggunaan bahasa menjadi dilema bagi saya mengingat saya ingin terus meningkatkan kemampuan Bahasa Inggris tertulis, tapi di sisi lain tetap ingin dapat menulis dengan cepat. Yup, menulis menggunakan Bahasa Inggris memerlukan waktu yang lebih lama daripada menggunakan Bahasa Indonesia seperti ini, apalagi kadang saya masih harus menambah perbendaharaan bahasa saya serta berkali-kali mengecek (proofread) tulisan saya supaya memiliki grammar dan structure yang benar.

This entry was last modified on: September 7th, 2017 at 1:29

What is Love

Well, I don’t really like to write about my love and relationship on my blog as if I don’t know that I already old enough for this kind of crap, but still my mind keeps tell me to write what I think before I fall into deeper depression. I’m not the kind of man that is easily depressed because of love… Well, perhaps I am. It’s simply because I can’t easily leave my past after it happened. So if you think this entry is immature or inappropriate since it is my personal thought, or doesn’t meet your personal expectation because you need more information about me since this is my personal website, I kindly ask you to stop reading now and find another interesting article in the web instead, or read another post in another category that’s available In this blog.

“Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me no more.” perhaps is the best answer for the title question.

On the previous post, I wrote about a girl, the third girl I met, which gave enough impact to me lately. Actually, the impact is far too strong and affected me until now. I still keep thinking about her, and even I always keep trying to get noticed by her.

I keep thinking about her but don’t have enough courage to make any contact to her. I just afraid I will end up disappointed with her replies, make her upset to me because I keep bothering her. I think it’s my selfishness so that I end up always want to bother her, despite of the fact that I almost never have chats lately. In the end I bothered more people in a chat group where she is one of the members, just because I want her attention. Sigh… I should just thinking more about other people before did that.

Some people will say, “grow your balls and text her!”, but it’s not as easy as they think. I had issues with her in the past which developed into a big barrier for my relation with her. Then why don’t you solve the issues and patch up your relationship with her? I’ve tried but I kept creating new other issues after that. It keeps repeating and perhaps annoyed her so much that she might think it’s better not to have any relation with me, or even worsen her thought about males in general. I can’t really guest what’s on her mind now, probably she doesn’t even really care about those issues since I’m not “somebody” for her. Who knows.

Sometimes I wish I can be more like other males who can easily moves on and search for other females. Instead I just want to prove to her that I can be the one for her, but still I’m stuck because I’m afraid. I’m afraid that I will cause her depressed about her future. I’m afraid that I will hurt her. I’m afraid that I will affect her in wrong way. I’m afraid that I cannot protect her and support her when she needs me. I’m afraid that some hurtful words will be spoken from her mouth just because she feels despair in me. I’m afraid the relationship will be ended up as what has happened in the past with my previous relationship.

The more I think about this, the more I realize that I have done something wrong. If I really love someone, I should simply let her happy. If they are happy but I don’t feel that happiness, it’s perhaps just lust or temporary love. Even if she dates another guy, I should be happy, at least I know that her mind has been changed and she can trust other males, though I know I will feel sad in reality. I just wonder that her smile will brighten everyone’s day, that’s the power of happiness.

Somehow, as a single guy, I wonder that it will be better if I don’t meet any single girls. It just hurt me more and make me feel responsible on what has happened around them. However, it’s part of experience that I will get, so it should not really matter if I think it thoroughly. Sadness, happiness, hope, despair, acceptance, rejection, for something called love is always worthy for your life lessons not matter how hard that lessons are. It teaches us how to behave to another person who is precious to you and you treasured her so much.

Perhaps I will not go to try to make any special relationship with another girl for some time since I feel betrayed and afraid for relationship lately. In fact, even since I have just get acquainted to a new girl, I just can’t keep my communication up with that girl lately, not because I’m lazy, but because I don’t have faith that the relationship will end up in the right direction, especially I get acquainted to her just because I have that relationship target to begin with. It just felt wrong.

Lastly, I will keep that good memory of her and hopefully my faith in girls in general can be restored, as with her faith to guys in general can also be restored. In the end, from what has happened in the past, for every girl that I have feeling towards who I wrote in this blog or other media, it will not ended up in “happy ending”, so I will just accept that fate as long as she is happy with her life. :D

PS: Oh, before I forgot, I’ve been said by some people that posts like this are immature, and if you think the same, I would like to thank you. Just let me decide what’s mature or immature for myself because the value of maturity is different between each people. You can say someone who are kept hurt by other people who can keep calm and don’t do any retaliation is mature, but for me it’s just as plain stupid as being raped but simply accepted it when it’s happen. I would rather write what I need to write and spill out what are on my mind rather than keep it and let it rotten, which may cause me to being depressed. Yeah, I know it’s not a fairy tale, which when she knows I wrote about my feeling and somehow –with miracle– she read this post and ended up fall in love in me. That’s why I wrote that this will not ended up as happy ending, at least for me.

This entry was last modified on: September 7th, 2017 at 1:29